Little Johnny The Conductor

Little Johnny was in the kitchen playing with his toy train as his father cooked dinner.

Little Johnny stopped the train and said, "All you damn a**holes who want to get off, get the hell off. All those who want to get on, get the hell on!"

"Little Johnny!" exclaimed his father. "I can't believe you are using that language! You should be ashamed of yourself! I want you to go to your room and don't come back until you have thought about what you've done!"

So Little Johnny goes to his room and comes back an hour or so later.

He resumes playing with his train, only this time when he stops it he says, "All of you ladies and gentlemen who want to get off, you may now get off, and those who want to get on, you may now also get on. And as for those of you who have a problem with the hour delay, talk to the a**hole in the kitchen!"