If I Had A Hammer
A man is in court for murder and the judge says, "You are charged with beating your wife to death with a hammer." A voice at the back of the court says, "You b*stard." The judge continues, "You are also charged with beating your daughter to death with a hammer." Again the voice at the back of the court says, "You b*stard." The judge says, "We cannot have any more of these outbursts from you
What is the problem?" The man at the back of the court says, "Fifteen years I lived next door to that b*stard, and every time I asked to borrow a hammer, he said he didn't have one!"